Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Monsty Eye

*I informed my niece that I wanted to write a story about an eyeball, which somehow turned into "monster eyeball." Naturally, she wanted to help. This is my transcription (and occasional translation) of her story.

This is a story about Monsty Eye. He eats people who have bad dogs. Yesterday, he found somebody with a bad dog, so he took him to his lab. Oh, yeah, Monsty Eye has a lab full of other kinds of monsters, like the Sock Zombie and the Daylight Vampire. The Sock Zombie eats children who wear socks to bed and the Daylight Vampire eats children who sleep with nightlights on. The Daylight Vampire actually came to my house last night, but my uncle bribed him to go eat some other kids by giving him some candy. That's why there were candy wrappers on the kitchen floor this morning.

Anyway, Monsty Eye likes to eat people who have bad dogs. My neighbors have a bad dog. His name name is Lenny and he's a weener dog. I don't know how to spell weener, but my brother might. He's too busy playing Nintendo Wii though. And he peed on the toilet seat this morning. The neighbor girl doesn't take baths, so Monsty Eye ate her last night, I think. She stinks. I hope he ate her. Maybe that will teach her to clean herself.

Then Monsty Eye ate Cameron, who my uncle has never met, but I told him that Cameron has a bad dog. Cameron is my friend, but he should be eaten by now, so I guess I won't be playing with him anymore.

Then Monsty Eye ate Logan, my brother, but he left me alone. Logan doesn't have dogs, but my uncle's dog Jasper (he's a German Shepherd) barked at Logan because Logan is bad. So Monsty Eye ate Logan, because he also likes to eat bad people who dogs don't like.

Monsty Eye is a monster eyeball. I forgot to tell you that. But that's how Monsty Eye got his name.

Then Monsty Eye ate Colin, my cousin, because Colin is a brat and monster eyeballs don't like brats, either.

The next day the monster eyeball was full so he went back home to his lab and never came back again.

The End.


  1. I have known a few bad dogs in my time. I wish Monsty Eye would have eaten them!

  2. Jeffscape

    This was one hilarious short story--- I would love to met Monsty Eye and snatch him and take him home and then -- well let me just say there are a few neighbors I would like to let Monsty eye have a feast with.. .
    A funny and cutting edge children story,

    I do not know if it was intentional but I left a comment on the other post you did as well -- but did notice the older date.. It doesn't really matter it was worth the read for both of these are gems.

  3. Careful, Jeff — according to your niece, they came for her neighbor, for her brother and her cousin... how long before Monsty Eye comes for her uncle?

    You have come up with another writer's strategy-- from "type anyway" to "niece says". Good stuff.

  4. this was cute and fun jeff. kids are amazing and have some incredible stories and ideas...

  5. This was fun to read. (I was glad that Monsty Eye never came back, though.)

  6. Monsty Eye made me smile. Seems the story telling gene runs int he family!

  7. Oh my! The most fun Magpie of all maybe! I loved it .... this grandmother has had lots of kid encounters and your words are perfect!

  8. Fun stuff. Monsty Eye is a very convenient little monster 'friend' to have. Ask your niece if he makes house calls. I know a weeny dog who needs to be put in his place.

  9. "Then Monsty Eye ate Cameron". Is this a comment on the British political situation. Hope so.

  10. o ho! that is why there are candy wrappers on the floor?
    well i'm sure monsty eye will get hungry again someday..send him my way, i got a neighbor with a very bad dog.

  11. can i borrow monsty eye for just a little while? there is a mangy flea bitten mutt who terrorizes little children, and i think that m.e. could begin with him.
    this magpie was so fun, very imaginative! kudos to your neice and, oh yeah, you did pretty good too ;)

  12. Ah ha! Your niece is sooo your niece! Now you need to post your nephew's story!

  13. Oh my goodness I love children's imaginations! This reminded me about a story a wee girl I used to babysit once told me- I'd actually blogged it! Quite short, but so very intriguing, voila http://siobhanlikessocks.blogspot.com/2009/05/arent-little-kids-imaginations-amazing.html

  14. I see it runs in the family!

    I love this. I hope her imagination stays with her.