Thursday, January 21, 2010

Just Desserts

She's caught. Red-handed and with no way out. No excuse, she knows, will be good enough to dispute her undeniable guilt. But what, she wonders, gave her away?

The action was clean, wasn't it? There were no immediate witnesses, and the theft was quick and silent. The merchandise was left out in the open with no guard, no lock, and no key.

Then it comes to her. As her accuser towers above, scold and indictment readying themselves on lips, she sees it all. A sudden awareness empowers her and she scans the surrounding area. There was too much evidence left behind.

There are small pieces of bread - minute, even - scattered upon the kitchen counter. The result, no doubt, of a clumsy grab and a hasty retreat into the living room. There is cinnamon powder shaken into the air, settling in barely visible blotches on the floor and in the carpet, and still wafting through all-too-visible mists in the reflections of invasive sunbeams.

She was told to wait until after dinner, but she just couldn't. No, she couldn't... those muffins just looked too delicious to insult by waiting to eat them.

Her mother stands before her, eyes glaring, spatula in hand (clearly about to become an improvised paddle). "What do you have to say for yourself, young lady?"

Guilt overwhelms her. Less for the crime and more for the fear of any ensuing spanking. But then, a moment of clarity. Of significance. Perhaps her young mind is on to something.

"I got you a muffin," she says innocently, handing the muffin in her left hand - the one she had yet to take a bite from - out to her mother.

Laughter erupts, and wink and smile assure her that she'll not be punished today. It is a monumental victory for a 5-year-old, and she revels in it.

Still, she got caught. This fact disturbs her developing imagination. She is not yet, it seems, quite clever enough.

She'll have to rectify that.

27 comments:

  1. With maturity comes deviousity?

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  2. by involving the family dog or little brother(unknowingly) I assume....Sly little fox! But who can resist? Nice; I knew you'd come up w/sumthin'

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  3. she will get better with practice...before she needs to slip her hand into someones pocket just to be able to buy bread because unemployment is at an all time high just like gas prices and food.

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  4. methinks she's already quite clever!

    one should never insult the baked goods!

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  5. A dramatic tale throughout, from the gripping first lines to the interestingly ominous conclusion... I enjoyed this!

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  6. Oh, very good! Funny, my mom and my aunt and uncle and I were just talking about that "paddle" spanking yesterday. It was a wooden spoon on the back of the bare legs for me. I was no thief, but very saucy (in the talk-back sense).

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  7. Ha. I've been known to use a spatula for a paddle before! LOL!

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  8. Multi-tasking, eh? Nice piece.

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  9. Well done~! You had me going. No idea how old, what she'd stolen, who caught her, etc. Original TT twist.

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  10. Well...I'm thinking that a muffin of such deliciousness COULD BE worth a spanking!!

    CLEVER, clever girl!

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  11. Very nice! She will get better with age. We all do.

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  12. just the right amount of tension. Very good!

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  13. Oh what an excellent "bread" TT, right? the dawning of consequence adn the chance to rectify things.

    BTw, loved your Toeastmeal comment--you very witty.

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  14. The invincible power of cute wins the day for our hero!

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  15. ah yes innocence and cute are just as powerful as freshly baked muffins or cookies--very nice--c

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  16. LOL!! What a visual this left me with...This sounds so much like something my oh too clever three year old might do, all the while wiping crumbs from her mouth:)...

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  17. With 3 kids and now 3 granchildren, this is a true part of childhood. They have to test their boundries

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  18. Good one! I am reminded of the Dexter episode when mom makes her famous muffins.

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  19. I like the crumbs of bread on the counetr & cinnamon in the air. Always a give away : )

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  20. Jeff, I love it! Just do. I couldn't guess where you were going and you hooked me to the very last line. (Humor, keeper of strays, insight to 5 year olds-nice.)

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  21. Hmmm, did you know me when I was five? I certainly got sneakier as I aged...

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  22. A fun early crime story. With me, it was a pack of rubber bands from the five and dime. Frankly, a muffin makes much more sense. What was I thinking?

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  23. You'll have to be on your guard. Next time she may lawyer up.

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  24. ha, ha, children catch on quick eh?

    pat on the back for you doing the double-theme!

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  25. She Was Caught Bread Handed!

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