Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Shear Insanity: Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

As of this moment, I am scheduled to get my hair cut on Thursday at 3 PM, Eastern time. A pretty banal statement, I would admit, were the situation not an unusual one. You see (well, no, you can't see, and I'm not about to post a photo, so you won't be seeing, but now I'm getting beside myself), I haven't had a haircut in over two years. July of 2007, if my memory serves me right (it often serves me wrong, which is why I don't play tennis. ACK! Bad joke, I know).

So that's... two years and one month? Give or take. The last time a hair on my head fell to the ground for reasons other than natural. Wait... I was in a couple of fist-fights this year... I probably lost some hair in those engagements. Anyway...

Why the haircut? Well, the unthinkable is about to happen: I'm about to rejoin the United States Army.

Those of you who need to change their pants, feel free to do so. I'll put some Zeppelin on in the meantime. A little "intermezzo," if you would.

Yes, I'm about to rejoin the Army. For no less than three years, at that. Only this time I'll be getting paid a Hell of a lot more money. But I digress. It is for this reason that my extremely long hair has to go (it really is a bit long... I can reach my arm behind my back and grab the ends of it).

Now, those of you who might have happened to have served with me already know that I am notorious for being that soldier... "the one with the long hair." But what I have at this moment really is ridiculously long. I kinda like it... some women I know kinda like it (and some don't, but I won't mention those hags)... and my cats kinda like to mistake my head for a scratching post.

A little while ago I was, in all honestly, just going to shave my head bald as some sort of misguided rebellion, but I really had nothing to rebel against so I decided against it. An even shorter while ago I was, in all honestly, going to go in for a bit of a trim, but one of my hag friends berated me for not donating my hair to a cancer wig organization (or something like that), so I held off.

But now things are coming to a head (hah! A pun! I fucking hate puns), and it's time to prepare myself for a few years of regulation-short hair and to donate my shower companions to a good cause.

Yeah, I'm rambling. So what? I had some cranberry vodkas for lunch. Eat me.

Someone just remember to remind me to take before and after photos.

Pointless Musings

I finally saw Watchmen today. I quite liked it... a very good adaption of one of the greatest graphic novels (read: glorified comic books) of all time, if not the greatest. The actress who played Silk Spectre II was pretty horrible, and a lot of the nuance found in the comic was left out, but I thought it was pretty good... maybe even brilliant.

My friend J is getting sick of helping me throw out my trash (long story; don't ask).

I recently reread 2001: A Space Odyssey. Stanley Kubrick's film was visionary, sure, but the book blows it out of the sky. Score one for Arthur C. Clarke.

In case anyone hasn't noticed, I love the movie Stardust. Watch it if you haven't already. It's The Princess Bride for the 21st century. Yep, I just made a hefty claim.

I still need someone to take my German Shepherd and/or my two cats for a few months. Any volunteers?

Leaving sucks, but traveling is the best thing in the world. I love irony.

13 comments:

  1. I think it's sweet you are donating your hair.

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  2. cool on the hair donation...returning to the military...dare ask what you are doing?...watchmen was ok, i thought it could have been better...i hope the leaving rolls quick and the travel is smooth...

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  3. I can't believe you called me a hag.

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  4. Remember to take before and after pics.

    There, happy?

    Watchmen has a long wait, plenty to see before it. Stardust may be next week, if I remember to record it. Remind me, why don't you?

    Good luck finding a place for the dog. As for the cats, leave 'em in the woods!

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  5. It's about time you cut your hair. You let it crazy long.

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  6. Why won't you post a picture?

    I loved Watchmen.

    I have not seen Stardust but you are not the first person to say something like that about it. I'll move it up the queque.

    Why are you rejoining the army?

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  7. Stay safe. God for you. hope it goes well. Now, cutting one;s hair? Never!!! One main reason I could not have ever joined the military. I like my curls too much. :D

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  8. Please send me a good picture of your "before" hair. I will miss it so!

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  9. Brian: Not sure what my job will be. Won't know for certain until later this year. But I'm assuming it'll be something related to what I used to do.

    Megan: I've had "interesting" experiences with photos on the Internet. And I'm rejoining out of boredom, mostly.

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  10. Wow got such a surprise that my computer froze! Can you still blog in the army. I've only just found you! I could never leave my dog.

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  11. It's not a full military cut... yet, but it's cut! :)

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  12. I like your haircut! I wish I had thick hair like that. It's nice that you donated it too.

    Also..I hope you don't find this creepy, or strange, or even offensive, but I took a nosy at your haircut pics...and I think you look exactly like Darren E. Burrows. Only, about 15 years ago! I used to be OBSESSED with this show called Northern Exposure back in the early 90's and had a crush on Ed and Darren E. Burrows played him, then I saw your pics and just though OMG! lol. Anyway! That's my creepy comment...for the moment.

    I have a friend in the army and I think he felt bored, so he never left, as he always said he was going to. I guess he just felt a little empty without it somehow.

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  13. An errant click, and I find myself here. Army? Three years? What?

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