Friday, October 26, 2007

Bad Drivers II: What Would Jesus Do?

We've all seen them... those cars with those Jesus fish on the back. Yes, some swear by them, some make fun of them, but I'm just here to answer the WWJD question. Well, sort of...

Here's what he wouldn't do:

Drive slowly in the passing/fast lane so others have to pass dangerously on the left.

Change lanes or slow for a turn without using a signal.

Speed up to match your passing speed just to be ignorantly annoying.

Ride your bumper.

Brake before using a turn signal.

Talk on a cell phone while driving.

Blast loud, obnoxious music.

Toss a cigarette butt out the sunroof so it hits the following motorist's windshield.

Attempt to beat a yellow light by shifting to the left lane and speeding up, then deciding against it and slamming on the brakes, only to realize a right turn was required and attempting to back up against oncoming traffic so as to get around the car that was passed for the attempt to beat the yellow light, and then fucking up traffic by having to wait for the right lane to clear because your dumb ass actually wanted to make a right turn.

The moral of the story: Jeff 1:1 - If you're going to be a hypocrite, don't advertise it.


  1. I hate drivers. And pedestrians.

    Posted by Joe on October 27, 2007 - Saturday - 7:34 AM

  2. I see a Jeffism here! PS I am supposed to be doing homework...