Monday, September 3, 2007

Licensed to Drive, Revisited

There are, as you are well aware, too many fucking morons driving around on our streets today. Too many idiots who don't seem to know how to use a turn signal; too many dipshits who can't drive in the rain; too many assholes who think yellow lights are NASCAR starting flags; and altogether too many ignorant fucks who don't even know their own states' driving laws.

And why? Well, because most driving tests are ridiculously easy. So easy, it's like there's a fear that America will cease to function should every half-retard out there not get a driver's license.

Solution (and this is by far NOT a catch-all): increase the difficultly of the driving tests (obviously), and introduced a tiered licensing system.

In other words: no high school diploma, no driver's license.

Here's how and why it would work. Clearly, more stringent driving preparation courses (such as a one-year driver's education course in high school, instead of a one semester) would pay dividends, but by forcing high school students to take the bus (it's free, school is required, what's the fucking problem), these young non-driving shitheads won't be on the road to drive up our insurance premiums and cause stupid accidents.

Also, by not finishing high school (which, though a topic for another blog, isn't even an effective benchmark for which to test "dumb-ass-ness"), you give up your right to have a non-restricted license.

Yes, everyone can get a license that will allow them to drive to and from work, to and from the grocery store, and to and from any post-secondary education. However, if that person with a restricted license is pulled over somewhere that is clearly NOT on the way (or from) one of those places, that person loses their driving privilege for the REST OF THEIR FUCKING LIFE. Deal with it.

To summarize all that chaotic crap above: graduate high school and pass your new driver's ed... or no unrestricted license.

Oh, and learn how to drive a stick shift WITHOUT power steering first. After all, learning how to actually CONTROL a fucking car will make driving one with all of the amenities that much easier.

I also think people should have to graduate high school before they get the right to vote, but that's neither here nor there...

Anyway, drive safe, and vote for Clint Eastwood.

1 comment:

  1. The only problem with this proposition is the fact that the criteria to get out of high school is often easier to meet than that of the driver's license test. At least taking and passing the written portion of the driver's license test proves that someone can at least read.