And there I was... staring at the emblem of "America's Most Trusted Condom." And it hit me.
Why name a condom after the Trojans?
As someone who likes to study Classical Greece, I was always under the impression that the Trojans were the star-crossed people that got screwed over because they LET SOMETHING THROUGH. You know, the whole Odysseus/Trojan Horse deal? I mean, there's even a class of computer virus called "Trojan Horses." For those that don't know, those are the viruses that you let in ON ACCIDENT.
Now, going with that logic, why the flying fuck would you want to wear a brand of condom named after a people that LETS THINGS THROUGH? I mean, is that some sort of subliminal warning by the company trying to let us know that Trojan condoms might not work? Would those things be better served by being called Spartan condoms?
Eh... never mind... and vote for Clint Eastwood.