Friday, February 16, 2007

Jasper, Part I

He just turned three last November. He's a baby, and he acts like it. Brave in the face of irrelevance, cowardice in the face of everything else. The other two beat him up, even though he's the biggest. But he's the sweetest, the tamest, and the most loyal.

And yesterday he started having seizures.

There was evidence that he had a couple of seizures earlier, but as I didn't know that he had them, I figured the tells were of something else. A fight, maybe. The smeared crap in the yard. The overturned water bowl. Could've been anything. But probably seizures.

As I watched one at around 11:30 PM, I really didn't know how to react. I worried, I wanted to panic, but I stayed calm. I watched as he tried to fold and swallow his tongue. I watched as he realized that something was wrong. I watched as he went into a panic, running around wherever there was room. I watched as his adopted brother, as scared as everyone else, tried to subdue him. And I watched as he collapsed, foaming at the mouth, defecating uncontrollably, convulsing violently, painfully. So I did the only I could do. I placed one hand on his head, the other on his body, and held him firm so he wouldn't hurt himself by bouncing his head off the ground too hard.

70 pounds of German Shepherd never looked so helpless.

I didn't see the onset of the second seizure, this one at about 6:15 AM, but I did hear it. And I got to him fast enough to see him flopping around in his makeshift doghouse. Again, he defecated. This time, when it subsided, he cried and howled in pain and confusion. Three, maybe four times. It was the most solemn, heartbreaking sound I had heard in a long time. Maybe ever. After he cried, he tried to stand up. Dizzy, disoriented, he looked like a newborn puppy trying to figure out what his legs were for. It took him almost five minutes to stabilize himself. Then he walked up to me, put his head in my lap, and looked as though he was trying to ask me a question.

He was suffering, and he didn't know why.

I don't know why, either.

I'm still waiting on the vet to call with the test results.


  1. Very sorry to hear about your puppy, I'll keep my fingers crossed for yall.

    Posted by **JEAN** on February 17, 2007 - Saturday - 8:27 PM

  2. yeah, so i'm crying now. :(

    i can't imagine watching jada or kiya go thru something like that. it breaks my heart for your baby.

    i hope the test results show what's wrong and the vet is able to treat it successfully. i'm praying for you both. (yes, i pray for animals!!! i like them better than i like most human beings)

    much love,

    Posted by you have no idea... on February 16, 2007 - Friday - 9:39 PM

  3. Jeff, sorry to hear this. I hope for the best, for both of you.

    Posted by Joe on February 16, 2007 - Friday - 9:16 PM

  4. About 7 years ago, I had a puppy who had seizures from a liver problem. She went blind, was disoriented, her whole body was paralyzed on one side, and she was covered in foam from her own mouth. I found her one morning like this. The vet had me put her down. Honestly, I cried for days. Couldn't even drive home because I was crying too hard. Couldn't talk about her for months without breaking down. People learned not to ask me how I was doing. I felt silly, all that grief for a puppy. But it killed me to put her to sleep. Does Jasper still have seizures? I guess I need to read part 2.